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What If They Don't Show Enough Affection?

We all have different behaviors about many things including how or when we show affection. In addition, there are a number of reasons why people do or don't show affection in certain circumstances.

If your partner isn't showing you the affection you want, you might be confused about what the problem is. Depending on your particular situation, there can be different explanations.

* You are in a new relationship and your boyfriend won't even hold your hand when you are out. The reason he doesn't want to show affection in public is that he doesn't want to appear to be taken.

This could mean that he is leaving his options open because the relationship is still new and he is unsure, or he may be ashamed of you. It is also possible that he is still seeing someone else and doesn't want to get caught in a situation he can't explain.

* You are in a new relationship and your girlfriend won't show any affection even when you are alone. This usually means that she isn't ready to make an emotional commitment to the relationship.

There may be some unresolved issues from other relationships or she may just prefer to take things slowly to ensure the relationship isn't going to turn out badly.

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* You have been seeing each other for quite a while and he is affectionate anywhere but in front of his friends as long as you initiate the contact. If he isn't resisting but isn't initiating the affection, then he probably just doesn't like the idea of showing affection in public.

The fact that he does resist in front of his friends only confirms that since he is more embarrassed by the display when you are in front of people he is close to.

* You are married and your husband won't show affection even though he used to. The fact that he has changed from giving affection to withholding it indicates that he isn't happy about something.

There may be an unresolved issue that is staying on his mind whether it is something you have argued over or something that has never even been mentioned. A serious talk about what is troubling him might be the answer but it may take some time to get to the root of the matter.

There is also the possibility that he has been unfaithful or that he has feelings for someone else. Don't start accusing, just open the channels of communication in a relationship.

* You are a newlywed and your spouse stopped being affectionate as soon as you tied the knot. Sometimes it doesn't take long for insecurity and doubts to set in after getting married and that can lead to a lack of affection.

Your husband or wife may be having doubts about the new lifestyle and may be insecure about the new relationship you share. Again, get your new spouse to talk about what is going on and start working on getting back on track immediately.

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* You and your partner have been together for a long time but he/she has suddenly stopped being affectionate in public, but not in private. This is the most likely cause for concern. Your partner doesn't want anyone to see you being affectionate so there is the strong possibility that your partner has been unfaithful.

Serial cheaters are more likely to run into the women or men they have cheated with and are more likely to have lied about being in a committed relationship to start with.

If you are the one who is uncomfortable showing affection to your partner, then you need to address the reasons behind your behavior and try to overcome them. Particularly in private, affection is an important part of any relationship just as the importance of self esteem in your relationship is.

Any change in behavior is a sign that something isn't as it should be and you should work on getting to the bottom of the problem. Otherwise, your partner may just be the type of person who doesn't think the rest of the world needs to know how they feel about you!

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