Infidelity Doesn’t Have to be The End
If you or your spouse has been unfaithful, but both of you have the desire to save your marriage it is possible.
It will certainly not be an easy or quick fix.
It will take much work on both of your parts. So, before you continue reading you have to decide if this is what
you both truly want and if you are both truly willing to work on your relationship, putting forth the necessary
The mistake that the person who was cheated on makes a lot of the time is to want things to go back to way they
were. The problem here is that if you go back to before the affair then you also go back to where the problems
began and you haven’t fixed anything.
It is completely understandable why they want to go back to “happier times” and back to when there wasn’t the
pain of being lied to and cheated on, but if all the times were happy then why was there and affair?
You got, it obviously wasn’t as happy as you thought. That does not mean the person who had the affair had the
right, but it is to show you that you don’t want to back to before the affair. So, how do you get from where you
are, which is in pain and angry to getting over the
If you truly want to save your marriage, the first step is to come to terms with it, let it go, and leave it in
the past. If you cannot do that then you cannot move forward. Which means you cannot move past it to the rebuilding
and restoring part, and if you want your marriage that is where you have to go next.
To get to the next step you and your spouse have to sit down and go through your marriage, yes all the way back
to the beginning, and write down all the hot spots, or all the places where you disagree or are unable to
communicate at all.
Do you argue about money, or do you not communicate at all? Do you agree on how often you should spend time
together, like date nights? Do you two share the chores?
Once you have the list down you need to go through them one at a time and come up with a plan to address each
one. As you address each one you need to come up with positive solutions and agree on how to correct them. That
will require patience and compromise from both of you.
What is exciting about this step is that you will be adding new and fresh ideas and implementing those into your
relationship hopefully putting a spark back into your relationship. As is happens in many relationships you get
lazy with each other, not taking the time to be attentive to each other needs. This is the opportunity to
fix that and make your relationship stronger, better than it was
before the affair.
If you truly want to save your marriage, you can with work and effort you can not only get past the affair, but
come out on the other end a better stronger couple.