Save Your Relationship

Is Your Insecurity Ruining Your Relationship?

Having moments of being insecure in a relationship is very normal. We all have moments of being jealous or days where our self-esteem sucks and we worry about our partner or the status of the relationship.

What is not good is when the insecurity is present every day, all the time. If one partner in a relationship is insecure it can wreak havoc on the entire relationship.

It is also very challenging for the other person because the insecure person doesn’t trust anything in the relationship. And if there is insecurity it can slowly destroy the relationship.

Even if your relationship has an extremely solid foundation it can be destroyed over time when insecurity is involved. If your partner is insecure he or she doesn’t trust you even if you have shown over and over again that there are no reasons not to trust you. That lack of trust will pick away at the foundation you have built until it crumbles.

And not only is the foundation being destroyed, but your patience is being tested on every level. Eventually, you will get too worn out to fight any more. Because it is not possible to fight a losing battle or fight one if your partner is not willing to fight too. So that alone will bring your relationship to its knees.

Another aspect of being insecure is the person’s level of self-esteem, or in this case the lack of self-esteem. An insecure person never thinks he or she is good enough and no matter what you tell them they still think they are below you.

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And in reality, you can’t fix it anyways. The insecure person has to find a way to build their self-esteem, because if they don’t believe it, no one else will either. The non-insecure person can and should be supportive, but understand they cannot fix the insecure person.

The answer to the question of whether or not insecurity is ruining your relationship can really only be determined by you. Everyone at one time or another feels some insecurity, that is so very normal and can be a good thing.

It can make you evaluate what you are doing and make some changes that will help your relationship. But if you feel depressed about your relationship more than you are happy, or if your partner is constantly questioning everything about your relationship making you crazy then it is probably ruining your relationship.

And it is probably a good idea to sit down with your partner and talk about your concerns. See if your partner is willing to either get some help or at least open the lines of communication so you can talk.

If your partner is not willing to work on letting go of his or her insecurities then you have to make a decision. Are you willing to continue to live like you have been? If not, is it time to end the relationship? And then you need to move forward with your life for you, so you can be happy and secure in knowing you tried everything you could.

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