Save Your Relationship

Has Your Love Gone 'Cold' on You?

If you have been together with the same person for a long time, it isn't unusual to start feeling as though your love has gone 'cold'.

Any relationship has peaks and dips and you may not even be at the same position at the same time as your partner.

Even though this is the natural flow that most relationships experience, you may be frustrated at not being able to feel the way you want to feel.

You may also feel rejected by your partner even though it isn't a sign that your relationship is in crisis.

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The Chilling Effects of Life

People tend to have much more stress in their lives today than ever before. Other commitments and activities can play a part in dampening the love between you and your partner.

If you have just had a full day of work, running the kids to soccer practice, going to the grocery, cooking, cleaning, etc., then you may simply not have the time or energy to even think about connecting with your partner.

While there is a lot of information available for rekindling a cold relationship, some of them have to do with rebuilding the emotional aspect of love while others are more focused on the intimate and sexual part of the relationship.

Not only do both of these aspects go hand-in-hand, but they should each depend on the other. If you feel more emotional love for your partner, you are going to feel more open to intimacy. Intimacy in a close relationship will also increase the emotional feelings you have towards your partner.

There are some things you can do to spice up both areas of your relationship but you will have to take an active role in planning your time and making sure you give your relationship the priority it deserves.

* Set a designated date night. Obviously, it should be a night that is free from other commitments and that you don't have to get up at 5am the following morning. Dress up, go out, and enjoy doing the things you both enjoy doing.

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* Give yourself a much-needed break. It's still true that you can't be good for someone else until you are good for yourself. Go for a facial, play a round of golf, or whatever makes you feel relaxed and special. Then you will be in a better mood and have a better attitude towards your partner.

* It's easy to get too comfortable in a relationship, especially one that has lasted for a long time. If you are concerned that your partner may not be as attracted to you as before, consider how you are presenting yourself.

Put on some makeup, do your hair. Don't let that stubble grow over the weekend. You don't have to spend hours making yourself presentable but you should make the effort to let your partner know you take pride in yourself and you care what they see when they look at you. Do things that will make your partner fall in love with you again.

* Do things your partner likes even if they aren't your favorite thing to do. The more you put into it, the more you are going to get back. If his idea of a romantic evening is watching a dirty movie with you, then pick up a new one as a treat. If she enjoys having you rub her down with oil, then by all means oblige her.

Unless something has happened in your relationship that has changed the way either of you feels, then the chill will probably pass and you will be right back on top of the next peak.

Making the effort to make your partner feel good about the relationship by focusing on the positive things and not the negative ones can help give your love a boost and warm things up even more quickly!

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