Save Your Relationship

Do You Feel Like Your Partner Doesn't Love You

Do They Act Like They're Just Going Through The Motions?

Is the ardor going out of your relationship? Is your partner indifferent to things that used to turn them on? Do you feel like your partner doesn't love you anymore?

Every relationship goes through ups-and-downs, but this seeming lack of interest in your partnership may have been going on for quite some time now. So, what is wrong and how do you correct the problem?

The easiest answer is the least desirable: Break-up! This is easy because it requires no commitment, no working at keeping the partnership alive and making it healthy again.

Break-ups are the norm now days. About half the marriages end in divorce. The break-up of seemingly strong healthy relationships occurs at an even higher rate. This is the age of the "throw-away" union.

You expect this in those high profile "Hollywood" relationships. Those people are playing roles so much, both on and off camera, that they don't know what's real anymore. More and more everyday folks are emulating their onscreen heroes.

If you are getting the disquieting feeling that your partner no longer has the intensity, nor the interest in your relationship that you have, it is time for a little self examination. Ask yourself these questions:

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Were you both equally intense and in love when the relationship began?

Did one or the other of you pursue the other until an attachment was formed?

What was the first attraction?

When the initial ardor began to fade, what replaced it?

Do you have mutual interests outside of your physical relationship?

What have been the strong points in your partnership?

What are the weak points?

What makes you thing the "bloom is off the rose?"   Do you think he or she has outside interests that have sidetracked the relationship?

The whole point of this exercise is to make you look closely at your relationship. Close examination should disclose any problem areas.

A frank discussion with your partner should take place. You need to evaluate the depth of commitment you both have towards renewing your partnership and making is stronger than ever.

Most people don't like change. They resist it as much as humanly possible and sometimes fail to see common sense. It is easier to make a person renew a commitment that it is to dissolve a relationship into which you both have invested time and emotions.

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Having a frank discussion with your partner in which you openly discuss all of the good things you have together. You have to discuss the contentious issues as well. Airing them will often make you both realize how petty there are and get you back on track.

A loving relationship is a two-person thing. You both have to be committed (not necessarily equally) to be open, loving and supportive of the other.

Once you have come to an agreement to make it work (again), you have to throw yourself into making each other happy. After all, isn't happiness what it is all about? Make it a point to do unexpected things for each other.

Guys, take your lady on a surprise date; wine, dine and romance her as if it was your first meeting and you want to make the best impression. Keep yourself up, dress well and put the seat down.

Ladies, try to be the best for your man all the time. Keep yourself looking good as men are much more "visual" than women.

You should both try to think of the other's needs before your own . . . and your own will be met. Do things that make each other proud. Stay positive in your thinking and your attitude will reflect this.

And, for both of your sakes, work at the relationship. Make a (re)commitment to each other.

If you are having communication issues in your relationship, or just can't seem to get through the day without arguing with your partner, check out:

 relationship recovery