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3 Communication Pitfalls to Avoid

Communication is not easy. People are so different and communicate in different ways and sometimes things get misunderstood.

And when things get misunderstood people get angry and/or hurt and sometimes it gets to the point where relationships end because of the misunderstanding.

But even more so people in general have a hard time dealing with conflict, or a difference of opinion.

Below are 3 communication pitfalls to avoid.

The first one is, needing to have the last word. We have all fallen into this pitfall. You might be having a discussion about the upcoming elections and you mention who you will be voting for and the person you are talking with begins to debate with you about why you shouldn’t vote for that person. It goes back and forth until you both get a little heated, and begin yelling instead of debating.

In order to avoid this pitfall, you need to start paying attention, and when you notice yourself crossing over into that, “no longer debating” mode, you need to stop and for a moment consider his or her position.

To them the way they think and feel about it is valid for them. So it doesn’t me either of you is necessarily wrong, just have a difference of opinion. What is important is not that you agree, but only that you respect each other’s opinions.

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The next one is shutting down and walking away. This type of pitfall is when a situation is getting tense the person just leaves the room or completely refuses to communicate any further. Conflict is not a pleasant experience, but it is a part of life and cannot be avoided. So some people shut down, not willing to even try to engage for fear of the possibility of conflict.

If you are trying to avoid this pitfall ask someone a question about something you really want to know about them and learn. No need for conflict just a friendly conversation. Most people prefer to avoid conflict too, so stick to the goal and you should be just fine.

The last pitfall to avoid is pay attention to your behavior, are you a passive aggressive type person? Most of us would say no way, but ask yourself these questions:

• Do you talk about someone behind their back instead of having a difficult conversation with them?

• Do something that is planned to hurt or harm someone else?

• Are you negative or resistant?

The whole goal of passive aggressive behavior is to gain power, or feel like we are. The tradeoff is your honesty and integrity.

If you recognize this in yourself and you want to avoid this pitfall you need to be aware of what is making you negative. Then find the courage to deal with the person who can do something about it. Do not assume they know why you are not happy. Find someone who is calm and can be a model for how you would rather behave.

In life there will come conflicts, how you deal with it and communicate will determine if you fall into the pitfalls of communication or if you will be able to deal with and resolve conflicts in your life.

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